Do you ever wonder if the next step towards change is going to transform you, or cause you to stumble? It's hard to trust that the 'leap of faith' off the proverbial cliff is going to let you fly, instead of crashing into a mangled mess on the rocks below.
But currently, I feel the wind beneath these fragile trembling winds.. and I am excited to share with you friends the changes on our horizon!
After keeping our oldest daughter (Azriel,5yrs) home for junior kindergarten year, and then sending her off to try out a local Catholic school for her senior year... we've recently decided to homeschool her for (at least) this next school year. Maybe that doesn't seem like a big deal to you, but if I'm being honest there was lots of internal 'freaking out' and paper bags involved. Because, I am not the type who embraced this idea right off the hop.
There were the silly reasons - like, "I'm just not creative enough to teach her".
The selfish reasons - "Will I ever get a moment to myself?!"
The socialisation reasons - "Will she be isolated from her peers?"
I was the champion of listing pros + cons for both sides of the debate... but after sitting on the fence for the last couple of years, it was starting to chafe.
So we are stepping out, and I am seeing the joy - instead of sheer panic - about this choice.
There's a lot more I could say, but for now just a few points:
We chose this path for our daughter (for now) because we believe it fosters her well-being. She has blossomed over the summer in ways we were delighted to witness, and have noted that it is in direct correlation to the quality time spent with her family/friends.
This does not mean we make homeschooling our 'gospel' and assume it's the best choice for everyone. I respect the convictions and choices each family makes for what is best for their children. Like many of the debates in our culture - this one seems rather polarising as well. I'm not out to convert or convince you to homeschool (my many homeschooling friends will be the first to tell you that I often questioned their reasons, in fact!) It is probably ironic to them that I am now on this side.
But maybe we don't need to make it about 'sides' with this issue. Let's just hold to the conviction to be on the side of our children's growth and health... and encourage other parents to do the same.
For now, I'm just feeling so blessed to know that this sweet gal will be by our side a whole lot more this school year!